My brother’s video production company recently received a piece of collateral from an Advertising & Marketing agency. The marketing piece was an attempt to promote a model, so videography companies like my brother’s would hire her. I happened to be with him when he opened his mail and, given my field (publicity), he showed it to me to see what I thought.
First of all, it took us a few moments to figure out what it was and why the advertising and marketing agency sent it to him. That’s a HUGE problem.
It’s common for a Small Business Owner or Entrepreneurs to make marketing mistakes when creating their own collateral, but it’s extraordinarily rare for a professional agency to put out a piece of direct mail with such an overwhelming number of obvious problems. The good news is that it’s a great example of what NOT to do.
Here, I’ve outlined their errors so you can learn from their mistakes:
MISTAKE: The document said “Press Release” at the top, but was not a Press Release. It was a Fact Sheet.
HOW TO FIX IT: Make sure you include the vital criteria for a specific type of document. For example, a Press Release should be in paragraph format with “Who, What, Where, When and Why” answered in the first two sentences. The Associated Press is a great resource for this sort of help. A Fact Sheet should be a bulleted list of facts about a particular company, product or event. If you search “Press Release” or “Fact Sheet” online you will find basic criteria for each type of document.
MISTAKE: The “Press Release” had two dates on it: August 3, 2007 and August 13, 2007. I don’t know why any collateral should have two dates listed like this, but if you are mailing something like this out, it should not arrive a full 8 months after the release! We received it in April 2008!
HOW TO FIX IT: Make sure the document is timely. If it has a date on it, keep it within a few days of the actual release date.
MISTAKE: There were various inconsistencies between the bullets in the Advertising agency’s collateral, including the model’s name being in all caps sometimes, and not in all caps other times (i.e. EMILY vs. Emily).
HOW TO FIX IT: Make sure everything in your marketing materials is consistent. This includes making sure everything is spelled right, but think about formatting and the overall look of the document, too.
MISTAKE: The order of bullet points was not impressive. The agency that created the pieces listed the model’s age and that she recently graduated from high school (at least recently as of August 2007). This is not very powerful. Many students graduate from high school when they’re about 17 or 18 years old. When we create this sort of document at Three Girls, we put the most interesting or important information first.
HOW TO FIX IT: Put the most important, interesting and impressive information first. Answer the standard “Who? What? Where?” questions in addition to “Why should the person receiving this care?” If it isn’t obvious, the collateral isn’t doing its job.
MISTAKE: One of the bullet points in the collateral piece is that the model is a “true triple threat; singing in a Sony Records sanctioned all girl band.” What is a Sony Records sanctioned band? How is it different from other sorts of bands? What’s the name of the band is she in? If her band is that cool, name it!
HOW TO FIX IT: Don’t leave the person receiving your marketing materials asking any questions. Everything they would ask should be included.
MISTAKE: At the very end of the so-called “Press Release,” the headline is repeated again (“Roll With a Real Role Model”) and it is stated that this model “Is Perfect For The Role.” What role is she perfect for? Even the most talented actors/actresses are not perfect for every role. The other issue is that the headline implies the girl is role model. To whom? What makes her one? There is nothing included in this release to show how she is a role model to anyone.
HOW TO FIX IT: Make sure the title or headline you choose is completely factual, and if it leaves the recipient asking any questions, the answers are easy to find in the content of the release. Catchy is good, but it needs to make sense.
Looking over this piece of collateral, there were only two things the agency that created this collateral did well:
1. They kept the information to one page
2. They included contact information and a website
I just hate to think about how much money was wasted on a totally ineffective and embarrassing piece of collateral that’s doing more harm than good. Three Girls could have created something better, and we don’t even specialize in marketing models! When creating your own collateral, make sure you don’t leave the recipient asking more questions than they had to begin with.